K referred to me as Caring, Sensible and God-fearing; another person, my sister precisely told me “I have never met someone with a kinder heart” – I’m left wondering where all these come from because left to me, I have a lot of hang ups.
I remember saying to a guy at some point “I don’t go back to my vomit” that got me thinking.
Do you know it’s possible to be unforgiving towards someone you’ve never met. Each of us most times, myself inclusive are so caught up in many emotional entanglements that we vow never to fall prey to that anymore. All these have left us with stone cold hearts and hardly anyone to love or love us in return. So, what happens to those coming to us with open hearts – do we leave them with a cycle of unforgettable sins that we drop at their feet. A closed heart is the same as an unforgiving heart.
I am not a saint, as wonderful as I may seem to be to some people, I have shortcomings that have the ability to override everything good that I’ve ever worked for.
I have the capacity to be selfish, ruthless, vindictive and a murderer – I discovered all these about myself this year and I tried constantly to renew my mind and lay aside every weight and the sin that could easily entrap me.
I will retract my statement by saying that I can go back to my vomit, to at least check what’s left of it – to see if what I ingested was the cause of the bile in the first place. I’m learning a lot this year – to let go, love unconditionally, look at decisions objectively and forgive like a child.
I’ve missed my mark a lot of times and in upgrading myself 2014, I just want to be surrounded with positive comments of myself. I can’t be perfect but I can be excellent by leading myself in all truthfulness of heart.
God matters a lot to me and my heart, and if all I’m doing hurts Him then I don’t deserve the chance I’ve been given. I won’t misuse His mercy but accept it for all the times I can’t find strength on my own; which is every second of each day.